I love that we are living in a world where we are starting to encourage self love. I think it's because most of us grew up in an age still where marketing and so on, basically told us we weren't good enough or pretty enough.
Maybe that's a whole different post. Today I want to talk about the fact that we can love ourselves and want to improve at the same. In yoga we speak of rajas (goal seeking, change and activity) and tamas (rest, digest, inactivity), 2 of the three Gunas (the third part being Satva or balance). Without getting to yogi on you, I think many of us struggle with the balancing act. The balance between wanting more and remaining the same.
Extreme examples of Tamas and Rajas
We wish to improve on ourselves, me for example, I have some wonderfully cute spring/summer clothes that don't fit. I would like to fit into them and be comfortable wearing them. In order to obtain that goal, I think to myself I'd like to loose "a few pounds".
We also wish to self love and be just who we are. At the same token I want to love myself and where my body likes to sit at and enjoy eating a drinking and being merry with friends and family. I can always buy new pants right?
I've actually struggled with this quite a bit lately. Finding that balance between loving myself the way I am currently and wanting a little more. But something I have forgotten is that they can actually exist together. I don't have to be one complete way or the other. I remember when I was on a mission to loose my "baby weight" after my second was born. It actually seemed to melt off, and during the process I was proud of myself. I loved my body for the limits I could push it to, the amazing things I did with it, such as grew a human and breastfeed!
Taking a look back at the last while or so I've struggled with my balance, my internal dispute I feel as if I have forgotten how to set healthy limits/goals and still love myself in the process. When I choose to love myself I sort of loosen up a bit too much and just LOVE all the things. When I decide to set goals and limits I become strict and unwavering, until I've decided I'm tired of it and loosen up.
The vicious cycle I believe all of us face. So how do we balance self improvement and self love? Like with anything, practice. Spending time actually thinking about our goals, instead of them being gut reactions to the scale or situations we've endured. Then realizing boundaries and limits can be done in a healthy way. And ALWAYS that we can forgive ourselves.
Progress, not perfection they always say. Even if some days progress is realizing that we can try again tomorrow.
Love,
Jen